Autumn
This summer, there have been multiple posts written on this blog, but they never made it past my head. There are even pictures to go with the posts. Those got past my head; they are in my camera. At some point, if I ever feel together enough, some of these things will make themselves seen.
It's been an indescribable summer. From diagnosis (June 27) to death (September 20) we had just under 3 months to enjoy our wonderful brother and blunder along this cancerous path. I like things to be black and white, and kept wishing for a manual. (not really, I'm not that sick.)
What was very clear from the very beginning, and continues to be the only completely clear thing, is love. Those of us lucky enough to be recipients of generous amounts of this elixir know its healing touch and soothing presence. Love provides a frame of reference when everything else has stopped having any meaning at all.
On Wednesday afternoon, I returned to the beautiful prayer room at my church, where I had met with friends back in June. Once again, surrounded by love, we cried, laughed, talked, and prayed.
And we go on. The leaves are falling, they are crunchy underfoot. Furnaces will soon be purring in our houses. Children grow, new memories are formed, we treasure the old ones.
September has always been my favorite month. Ironically, it is also the month that has always been the hardest for me emotionally. Perhaps it is the presence of intensity and the willingness to be completely present with whatever comes. In any case, it is always transition time, and one filled with pain and beauty.
May it always be filled with love.
Autumn
It's been an indescribable summer. From diagnosis (June 27) to death (September 20) we had just under 3 months to enjoy our wonderful brother and blunder along this cancerous path. I like things to be black and white, and kept wishing for a manual. (not really, I'm not that sick.)
What was very clear from the very beginning, and continues to be the only completely clear thing, is love. Those of us lucky enough to be recipients of generous amounts of this elixir know its healing touch and soothing presence. Love provides a frame of reference when everything else has stopped having any meaning at all.
On Wednesday afternoon, I returned to the beautiful prayer room at my church, where I had met with friends back in June. Once again, surrounded by love, we cried, laughed, talked, and prayed.
And we go on. The leaves are falling, they are crunchy underfoot. Furnaces will soon be purring in our houses. Children grow, new memories are formed, we treasure the old ones.
September has always been my favorite month. Ironically, it is also the month that has always been the hardest for me emotionally. Perhaps it is the presence of intensity and the willingness to be completely present with whatever comes. In any case, it is always transition time, and one filled with pain and beauty.
May it always be filled with love.
Autumn
posted by Carlotti at 5:44 AM
3 Comments:
well said.
You have been a huge cache of love.
Hey Carlotti, lovely post, yep love.....lots of love - we have lots to be thankful for. Kettie
I just love this post. It is well written, and said with MUCH authority-- you have lived and walked everything that you describe. I've said before, and I'll say again, your link in this chain is/was and shall be INTEGRAL. It is not an easy position, still, I know you do it well, and you are not alone.
Love you, Joyce
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